From undeniable hurt to healing

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

MATTHEW 11 : 28

Hellooooooo everyone,

I hope you are doing well. If not, I hope at the end of this lecture, you will be able to take a step forward in your life. I hope this article brings up awareness, strength and encouragement to step out of pain. today we are going to address a very important topic , “ hurt”. We have all been hurt in some sort of ways and we might still be dealing with it. I describe hurt as emotional bleeding. In this article , I try to bring some light on how to acknowledge if we are hurt, how we are supposed to deal with it and mainly how to avoid to get into the vicious cycle of eternal pain. wish you a happy and inspiring lecture !

People say loves blind ... but it’s nothing  compare to what hurt can do .... hurt will blind you , it will make you hurt other people, it will place you in a victim spot, you are going to be physically paralyzed and mentally enslaved by hurt , it will make you feel like your hurt is the most valid thing on earth and that you have every right to be mad.You are going to be more aware of what hurts you than how to seek help. People tend to forget that the solution to what hurts you is also painful but «a good pain » that completely frees you. Remember when you pour alcohol on an open wound, it may hurt but ends up closing the wound. But in the process,  even the fact of pouring alcohol to close the wound,  people will still think you are trying to hurt them. A typical of example is the fact that you will always « feel judged », meaning you will always feel hurt. And that’s the work of the enslaved mentality, hurt places you in. You have to know that alcohol on a open wound is painful but you definitely come out healed. 

The most dangerous thing is that your hurt will tell you « don’t go and look for the alcohol( healing or solution ) because it is going to hurt you more » , what it doesn’t tell you is «  that alcohol may be painful but you will be free from me (hurt)».  Hurt will tell you «  stay  with me at least you are already used to me , that alcohol (healing ) can be more painful than me, don’t take that risk! ». Guess what, that is when you start having « fears » to look for solution ( healing ). Hence you build a tall barrier (blockage) between the hurt you feel and the solution you need simply because you are scared. While the barrier is growing, hurt will make sure it destroys every side of you and what will be left will just be the shadow of what you were before! 

The worse thing is to remain in « the eternal victim spot ».You will loose relationships, opportunities and much more,  because you thought people were trying to hurt you while they were trying to help you. Guess what, some people will leave your life because your hurt occupies the spot , they were supposed to occupy in your life. They didn’t leave , your hurt push them away! 

Those who choose to stay are not always your friends , most are « enablers ». Enablers are people who will sympathize with your hurt but will not actively help you get out of it. Why? Because some of them «  don’t want to hurt you more » or «  enjoy looking at you been hurt because their own lives might be as miserable as yours but they won’t necessarily let you see that ». Hence as you can see enablers are either as hurt as you are and will definitely hurt you whether you are aware of it or not. If they are not contributing to your uplift ( growth), they will contribute to your downfall ( enslaved mentality) whether they do it consciously or not. Very few people will stay and fight against the hurt enslaving your mind but that is not their responsibility. However,don’t be surprised if they choose to love you from a distance. 

Being hurt can happen, choosing to stay hurt is a choice you made unconsciously or not. Been free will cost you, your pride , your ego , it will force you to humble , it will force you to face the hurt you have been running away from for so long. The truth is we love to stay hurt. Why? It’s because we love using the «  victim card ». When something doesn’t work the way we want, it gives us the opportunity to say «  it’s because I’m hurt » or «  don’t you see how hurt I am ? »  or «can’t you see how much I am suffering ? ». Hurt will tell you «  can’t you see people sympathize with you because of me ? » or « they are kind to you because you are hurt, so keep on being hurt, why do you want to separate yourself from me? » those are the types of lies, hurt will sow in your mind.

Hurt is also a good excuse to act irresponsibly or be mean. It’s a good reason to get a revenge. But what people forget is , hurt will kill you first before it lets you destroy somebody’s else life. Hurt will change you into a weapon of destruction hence you can destroy more people. If you don’t agree with this, check all the areas of your life. You probably use the victim card more often than you think. 

Stop trying to think you can make hurt an ally or a friend ! It will never be your friend. It can be a « catalyst that pushes you to do some stuff » but it will never be on your side. Stop trying to act tough and strong, thinking you can handle everything. You are not going to be fine until you address «  the real root of the issue ». Stop looking for who to blame for your hurt. Yes , you were hurt by someone but it’s YOUR RESPONSIBILITY TO SEEK HEALING BECAUSE IT IS YOUR LIFE ! When you are hurt , anything or anyone , may seem like they are hurting you,  even when they are not ! Because YOU MADE THE CHOICE TO STAY HURT INSTEAD OF DEALING WITH IT. Your heart became the temple and house of all sorts of hurt to the extent that LOVE HAS TO FIGHT TO PENETRATE !  You can’t handle it yourself seek for  « help » BUT BE READY TO KNOW THAT IT MIGHT BE A PAINFUL PROCESS. 

Yes, you probably heard  « what is mine , will certainly be mine » but it’s not always true, you can destroy what was meant to be yours. However a wise man who acknowledges his short comings , flaws , mistakes, imperfections will actively run to God. A wise man knows that «  In Christ, he has everything that he needs and then only, yes you will be restored of what you lost and what is yours will be yours ». Don’t wait to fix yourself to run to God, Run to Jesus and he will fix you! God loves you but will never love the flaws in you!  When you run to God everyday , that’s doing your part of the Job , that means you take responsibility for your life and God will do his part! « God wants you AS YOU ARE  and he will make you AS HE IS  »

signed HerBlackQueen !